....alright. That's enough. Holy hell, am I glad that era is over with. Rather than just show you a picture of the new entertainment center, I think I should tell you what it took to get it here. This, folks, has been an odyssey that would have Homer picking up his football and going home. It began when we trucked Didgeridoo Boy's furniture in shortly after he and I got married in January of last year. There was a thing, a large, brown thing that was supposed to hold a television. We decided to use it until we made up our minds about an entertainment center.
And then came the morning the thing was leaning out from the wall by a couple of inches. We decided to get wire shelving - - after all, it would be something we could use in the man cave/vintage game room/whatever space later on. That was in February of last year. Didge decided he liked it, and told me he could make it look nice. We are going on to the next paragraph now, as I do not want the tics and hollering to begin again.
He put me off a lot. A lot, a lot. I would suggest something, and he would nix the idea. Air, he said. The gaming systems needed air. The television was too heavy. He didn't like the color. This one didn't have enough room. That one was too big. Bananas. Cornbread. F***ing balloon animals, hopscotch, and candy apples. GIVE ME AN ASPIRIN. Shetland ponies.
We decided to wait until we got a new television. Did that. I brought up the entertainment center again. (Let me go stomp my feet.) (Back.) More resistance. I went shopping without him and brought back pictures. He got technical about measurements and named something I'm certain he thought was impossible. HA! I found something, showed him a picture, and he said it was cool. Right then, it was set in stone.
But he wasn't done. Oh, no, Didgeridoo Boy was far from through. We had such a row one evening that he took my car for a drive and tried to peel out. It wasn't going to work. There would be cables everywhere. The cables could not be close together because they would get hot and melt and burn up and, oh, the horror. Mules. Snowshoes. Let us skip together through the red-hot coals of hell. Pie. Bees.
HISTRIONICS REALLY WORKED FOR ME!
Was there going to be a shelf over the television? Didge demanded to know this in our last go-round. I said yes. He said that could not be. There wasn't going to be a shelf over the television and if there was he was going to move everything into the storage room and that was the end of it. Kindly return to the top of the entry and make good note of the ding donging shelves over the television in the former configuration. Do it or nobody's getting a biscuit. Help me.
I finally just went and bought the thing and told him when it was being delivered. It arrived yesterday, and was all assembled while Didgeridoo Boy napped. He swore as he was setting it up that it would not work, finding every conceivable thing wrong with it that he could. He complained about it being dusty as he put all of his things into it and configured everything to his liking. Finally, he said, "I approve." But he still thinks it might be too big. And there's a dent in it.
As it's such a lovely morning, I'm going to go out for a while and hop around the neighborhood on my imaginary pogo stick. Don't wait up for me.
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