Squaring off....

Dear Williams-Sonoma:

I love you. Truly. Really. Your locations are, like Sally Beauty, temples to me. I will shell out the bucks for your tins of hot chocolate, and plop down the debit card for gadgets I could score elsewhere for less. That said, these are wrong:

And they are wrong because they are freakin' forty dollar biscuits...that are square.

Let me explain something to you. Biscuits. They're not a purely Southern thing, I realize, but in the South, they're what one could consider a staple food. Some things require a biscuit as accompaniment. Some days require a biscuit, just because they're that kind of day. I have White Lily, butter, and cream in my kitchen right now - in about half an hour, I could whip up a batch of these and not have them cost forty dollars, less shipping. (With shipping, they become fifty dollar biscuits.) (That makes my head spin.) But I would not use butter. And I would not use cream. But then again, I am not an artisan baker. Here is how I would make a proper White Lily biscuit:

And they're not square.

Honestly, what's next?

"A proper pot of grits, stirred with a wooden spoon by an Appalachian grandmother."?

"Sweet tea, brewed according to secret methods by master home cooks in Charleston, South Carolina."? (The secret - sweeten the stuff while it is warm, darlin'.)

"Cornbread. Made without sugar, in the true Southern fashion, in specially-aged antique cast-iron skillets."?

"Round biscuits."?

"All of these fine products blessed by Mississippi gnomes prior to shipping."?



Tough love aside, though, I still adore you. Just....damn.