Why I oughtta.....

So here's the deal with yesterday:

Didge slept. Boy, did Didge ever sleep. He had the day off, and said he'd head to Mom's with me since I had work to do there, and then? We were going to run some errands. As I started to get ready yesterday morning, he said he was going to catch a power nap. I called Mom and pushed things back a bit, deciding on 1pm.

At six minutes till one, I tried to wake Didge for about the tenth time. No go. Nuh-uh, not having it, not budging. He was becoming frustrated, and would hurl himself into a flip to face either the back or the front of the couch with every "are you going to wake up" query. After the flip, he would sniffle and jerk hell out of the blanket. I finally asked if he was coming, and somehow, he managed a *smartass* tone to his negative grunt. I said, "Fine. I'm going without you. See if I take YOU anywhere." A few steps down the hall, I added, "D@ckhead!"

I came home about an hour later to a still-sleeping Didge. Told him what time it was, and that I'd like to get the errands run so I could clean the yard. "Gimme a minute!" was all I got from him. He performed another flip, moaned, sniffled, jerked his blanket, and went back to sleep. I informed the dog and cat that Daddy was some description of very unsavory life form.

Another hour. I told him it was three o'clock. No response. I decided to curl up next to him on the couch and snuggle him awake, which resulted in Didge becoming somewhat hysterical. "What the hell are you doing???? You almost flipped me off the couch!" I asked what I'd done. He said, "I'm in a bad mood. Can't I get into a bad mood? You get in bad moods, now I'm in one." Then, in keeping with his pattern, he flipped, sniffled, and jerked his blanket - only this time with a little more force. He *meant it*. I marched off to clean the yard. I also cleaned out my car. Rang the doorbell to annoy him while I was at it.

After taking out the trash, I decided to give poor Totsi the Dog a bath - my frustration had me ticking things off my to-do list in grand fashion by that point. Sleeping Beauty woke up in the middle of that, and came into the bathroom to watch me finish dousing the poor precious, grinning. For whatever reason, he couldn't understand why I was shooting him stiff glances. He also didn't understand why I didn't try harder to wake him up. When I explained things, he was a little surprised: "I WHAT??" He apologized profusely, explained that he had a bad headache, and offered maybe that was why he was being so difficult. I accepted all of that because he *is* devastatingly cute, and he *did* apologize over and over again.

He made up for it by being very tolerant while shopping, only becoming mildly impatient while I was trying to decide on the right nude lipstick. (And a total aside: Have you ever tried explaining that concept to a man?)