Allerhatin' it...

And so, it is the last day of August. Holy hell. September starts tomorrow - my birthday month, the month in which I am seriously considering dragging Didgeridoo Boy on a camping trip to celebrate said birthday, and during which Casa Didgeridoo is FINALLY going to see its rooms being transformed. (It's been two years, almost, since the first big wave was finished.)

Yesterday, I accomplished the next-to-the-last big thing towards beginning to paint: I cleared out a full quarter of our storage room. Since that's next-to-last, I'll bet you're wondering what the last is, right? Didge's hella honkin' television is coming off my late Victorian table in the bedroom, going right up the stairs, and into part of what I cleared. And that's slated to happen today - but it might wait.

Care to know why it might wait? Digging into that room exposed me to more dust and cat hair than I normally encounter in a year. I have been sitting as still as possible all day drinking Breathe Deep tea and waiting for when I can take an aspirin, and have considered making some kind of sacrifice to the allergy gods for a little relief. It'll pass, I know, but damned if I'm not decidedly miserable.

Have you ever dealt with a nose whistle during meditation? Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Yes, yes. Today is a very nice day to my my precious Puck of a husband wait on me hand and foot. As if. More realistically, I think once I've knocked out some things that can't wait, it's a perfect day for taking in a documentary, paying the rent on my natural hair color (ha), and rebooting my nails. May your afternoon be glorious and sneeze-free.

The pictures with no pictures of Jupiter Jones...

I didn't get pictures. I didn't have time, as it all happened too quickly and I was too caught up in wondering what might happen and what needed to be done. Laughter? Yes, there was some of that, admittedly - - as well as a keen interest in not being caught in the line of fire. This was a time to stand against a wall and let Didgeridoo Boy handle everything, just because, and because it was all his idea.

He decided last night was the time to introduce Jupiter Jones to a collar, and it was one with a bell. "Let's see what he will do." And the thought entered my head that I might like to get a video, but I decided to start backing away a little bit. The way the kitten was rubbing his chin on his chest with his eyes looking all the world like they were crossed made me feel like that might be the best choice.

Didge chose to try this in the foyer, so the only places to be out of the way were down the hall and into the bathroom - - which Didge conveniently claimed as his own. At the point in which Jupiter tried to stand on his tail like a kangaroo about to box, we both ducked (why, I don't know), and I tried to hide behind Didge. He wouldn't let me. But it was fine - the kitten didn't fly down the hall with his claws extended as I had feared, instead, he rolled to one side with his mouth open (still chin-to-chest and cross-eyed) and put his left hind leg behind his head.

And we both said, "Oh, shit." Then he put his right front leg alongside his head and writhed, spinning. We said, "Oh, shit.", again. When it became evident that Jupiter was going to find a way to get his lower jaw under the collar, Didge boldly stepped in and unclipped the collar, making the observation that Jupiter would likely not be a cat who liked collars. The kitten solidified that opinion by jogging down the hall with a freakish amount of purpose, taking a swing at my legs on the way to the living room.

That's not the end, darlings. Oh, no. Think of who we're dealing with.

Didge decided, a couple of hours later, to try it again. Jupiter moved his head around in a few large circles, eyes crossed as before, suddenly became excessively still, then flopped down on the floor and became even more so. And we stood, looking. Totsi the Dog came over to sniff - she had to make sure her kitten was okay - and he still didn't move. Accordingly, neither did we. Didge said, "Yeah. He's not going to move until I take this thing off. Some of them do that when they don't like something, they'll just lay down on the floor and refuse to move." He bent down over the seemingly lifeless Jupiter, and proceeded to unsnap the collar.

And Jupiter moved. He flipped onto his back, grabbed Didgeridoo Boy's wrists with both of his sets of front claws, and bit him on the thumb while making a grand attempt to get his back claws into Didge's forearm. Once the collar was finally off, Didge put it on the mantle and the subject was dropped. So, like Didge said after his first attempt, clearly this is a cat who will never in his life wear a collar, because we're damned sure not going to try putting one on him again.

I don't even want to begin to think of what it will be like for Didge to have to give him a pill.

Already?

This Friday marks the last day of my trip through Baron Baptiste's 40 days. I have dropped a few pounds and some lingering bad habits, learned how *not* to push myself to the point of injury on the mat, and have somehow acquired the ability to more effectively roll with the punches with Didgeridoo Boy. No mean feat, this - Didge is a master of manic antics, someone who can turn a quick jot into a convenience store into a celebration of the most thorough nervous breakdown.

Having said that, I've also found my newfound pattern of existence is not without its tests. Let's flip into the moment, shall we? Would you like to know what he is doing right now, at this very minute, blessed Didge? He is playing a song, back to back, over and over, and is probably dancing. I would not know, I am in the bedroom. I can hear it, but it's not in my face, so to speak. Well -

- actually, it is a little bit in my face, isn't it?

Would you like to hear it? Here. Let's share. No, really, I don't mind. I. Want. To. Share. This. With. You.

There. I have shared it.

Yoga nidra, anyone?

It's Friday, y'all...

As you know, Casa Didgeridoo is being prepped for painting madness. The living room is storage central for furniture and whatever else out of the bedroom and what had been our dining room. (These are stills from a video that refused to upload.)

Didgeridoo Boy finds all of this a little bit exciting. This is what I walked out of the bedroom to discover yesterday, in the midst of pulling things out from under the bed and vacuuming out corners.

He's dancing to the theme of some 80's horror flick.

Mom has been over helping with spackling and heavier-duty paint prep. While she's here, we've been putting Didge outside -- I mean, having him do yard work.

Actually, I guess that does mean we've been putting him outside.

Enjoy your weekend!

Like I said yesterday...

Things have been a bit chaotic.

Today, I gut the bedroom in preparation for painting. Didgeridoo Boy continues with yard work. Onward!

I'm fine, really...

I swear - I'm absolutely fine.

I've just been getting the house ready for painting, gutting the back yard for a makeover, and so on, and so forth.

Laying on the floor seems like the most natural thing in the world.

Do what? Oh.

While roaming Lowes in search of painter's tape and decorative handles, this:

It took me a little bit.

Moments in kiddieland...

It is Monday! Yes, yes, it is Monday. The Fruit Feast is over as of Friday, I'm heading out to buy lots of fun painting supplies for Casa Didgeridoo's makeover this afternoon, the back yard is being gutted early this evening, and Didgeridoo Boy is apparently no longer nocturnal. At 8.00am, he was parading around the house after a good night's rest, grinning like the Cheshire cat and playing whale songs on YouTube for the cats.

Perhaps my having gone through the three-day Fruit Feast motivated him. If that's the case, perhaps he took my sticking to that as a personal challenge of some sort. Or, more likely, he's so damned glad he didn't go through what I went through on Friday (we will never speak of it) that he's been consumed by joy, and that energy has carried him into a new way of life. It might be something far more elementary, as he's just tired of missing out when I go to the grocery store, because that is his favorite performance venue. But whatever. Didge is up early, and I'm glad of it.

Between seeking out whale songs for the cats and videos of steam locomotives, and around the time he asked me what people would think if he and Totsi the Dog took to holding up cars on the road behind our house dressed like cowboys from the wild west, he found some nice things to share with me on Facebook.

As you can see, paranoia settled in with his Mini Mouse presentation.

And now, as I am about to head upstairs for yoga and meditation, he is putting on "Return of the Jedi". I think I'll take him to the park for a while after, because he seems to have some excess energy that running around will take care of. Then we'll come home and, after his nap, I'll give him a snack and have him complete some of his educational coloring pages. That should prime our young man for yard work. Today is going to be a fine day indeed. I can feel it.

Gee-nee-yuss...

I am so proud of myself!

Behold, the most epic kitten toy in the history of Casa Didgeridoo, at least. Maybe the state. I am so pleased I'd prance if I could. (I'm on the last day of a three-day cleanse, so prancing isn't an option at the moment.) What exactly is this wonder thing composed of?

A little plastic box that held grape tomatoes, and the remnants of two of the noisiest kitty toys I've ever encountered. They used to have feathers on them, but Jupiter Jones ate those, leaving only the little plastic flower that houses a bell. A little bell, by gods, a little bell - a very, very loud little bell. Jupiter was delighted with playing with these things as they are, but he kept scooting them into the pantry and under the refrigerator, resulting in much leg-popping, head-pouncing, NOW-ing drama, so we took them away. Enter the little plastic box, and voila!

There's a lot going on with this simple toy. He loves trying to get the bell things out, they still make noise (lots and lots), the box scoots all over the kitchen floor providing yet another level of entertainment, and it never slides up under anything. Jupiter wouldn't play with the toy for the camera, he just sat, but trust me - he plays with this a lot. Happy, happy day! Happy cat, happy house, happy family.

Enjoy your weekend!

Looks like rain...

So, this was Didgeridoo Boy's idea.

A cute little raincoat for Foot Foot, a cat who tends towards moody. Wouldn't she be cute in a little raincoat?

Adorable. Really, just so freakin' adorable.

Once he caught her, he had to be rather cautious in taking the raincoat off. She has never been asked to wear one of these again.

Truth feast...

I think I've mentioned that I am working my way through Baron Baptiste's 40 day program. Currently, I am in the fourth week, when it is suggested one do the Fruit Feast. Today is my first day of said Fruit Feast. I've just polished off a smoothie made with frozen berries, frozen bananas, and coconut water - it was tasty. Before that I had a cup of hot tea - Yogi Tea "Breathe Deep" - with no sugar, honey, agave, stevia, little dab of apple juice concentrate, nothing. Just eucalyptus goodness in a cup, and hot.

Forgot something! Before the smoothie, I went upstairs for my morning yoga practice after taking an inordinately long time to wake up. Sat down to center myself before beginning, and my stomach growled so loud it spooked Foot Foot Kittycat, who likes to lounge on a chair in that room. So I said, "F--- this, I can't do this hungry, I will die, f---, f---, f---." Then I looked at the cat and said, "I would not cross me until Saturday if I were you." Rolled up my yoga mat, swearing the whole time (at what I do not know), and saying that nobody was going to f--- up my mat. Trotted downstairs to make the smoothie, where blessed, sainted, sweet little Didgeridoo Boy asked me if I would like pizza.

I became more of a martyr than Joan of Arc. While I was making the smoothie, I found the process of grinding frozen bananas and berries very satisfying in a vindictive sort of way. Made a dramatic exit from the kitchen and headed to the bedroom, where I am now, cozied up with a favorite blanket. Once my delicious smoothie has settled, I'll head back up for yoga and meditation.

Have you noticed what's gone awry yet? Any idea what the missing factor in my morning might be that could have me in such a grogged-out tizzy? Before I start over-relishing writing like a complete smart ass, I'll tell you:

I've not had my coffee.

And I don't get my coffee until Saturday.

Please send some preemptive healing vibes to Didgeridoo Boy.

Dorito...

Yesterday, Mom and I went to lunch. Our server's name was Vitoria. My mother is the epitome of well-mannered, and is always sure to thank servers and address them by name. On our way out of the restaurant, Vitoria thanked us, and told us to have a good afternoon. Mom said, "Thank you, Dorito, you have a good day as well."

And then she looked at me and said, "Ohh, my Lord, I just called her Dorito."

Leaps...

He lives to leap, young Jupiter Jones.

But those video stills? Nothing. Nuh-thing. This very morning, in fact, our own precious little Nijinsky jumped off the damned balcony and sailed down into the living room.

Ouch...

Very, very trying day yesterday, everyone. I shut everything down (myself included) and declared a bed day.

See you all Monday!

When Totsi was wee...

Totsi was a precious puppy. Here she is the day I brought her home. (Pardon the quality of these pictures - I had the single crappiest digital camera on the planet at this time.)

I got her at Walmart. Well, not really, I was running errands one Saturday morning, and needed to make a stop in a shopping center that contained a Walmart to dump several bags of old clothes into the Salvation Army drop box. On the way into the shopping center, I saw someone with puppies for adoption, and stopped to look at the adorable balls of fur that were bouncing all around. The tiniest one, an itty bitty, adorable German Shepherd/Siberian Husky mix, was happily taking rope tug toys away from the much larger puppies, and not letting them have the toys back. I had to have her.

Just a slight hitch - I was taking all of those clothes to the drop box because I was turning my spare bedroom into a closet, and my walk-in closet into an office. Saying that an entire end of my house was in complete disarray that morning (29 October 2005) wouldn't be coming close to reality. But I brought Totsi home. Puppies can be happy in boxes while their humans work, right?

Wrong. Way, way wrong. She got out of boxes, cleared a security gate, and made her way under the bed to tear some stuff up. Little by little, this happened to the bedroom:

(Look. There she is inspecting what I had to do.)

Yes, a stereo and two folding tables. It gets better, baby:

A trunk. And what's that pink plastic thing?

That would be a lawn chair covered with some fabric to keep her from getting through the holes to the folded stacks of things I had finished going through. The bed was covered in clothes I was still sorting. Totsi had a habit of peeing on anything soft left on the floor at that age. Rather than take the clothes off the bed every night, I just put an air bed on the floor and let the puppy sleep with me. That's what you see in front of the lawn chair. Wait until you see the foot of the air bed:

It's a wicker chair turned into an off-the-floor basket for other things I was sorting. (Note the bottle of Febreeze on the desk.) Eventually, though, it was all finished up and Totsi learned to behave herself. Mostly. She would, and still does, get a little sassy from time to time.

Enjoy the rest of your day. I'm off to continue recovering from this morning's yoga practice and break up yet another hissy-pop kitty cat fight.

Confession, or procrastination practice...

I love my little room at the top of the stairs. A few mornings ago, I noticed something interesting while sitting on the floor in there. You'll understand why I was sitting on the floor in a bit.

Something in that 60's daybed headboard thingy inspired me, so I set the Vignette app on my Droid to take snapshots with random effects. I then started finding all sorts of things around the room that might produce something really interesting.

That, for instance. That would be a closeup of something on my second grade book bag. It's made from a pair of my dad's old jeans, and the patch is a souvenir of a launch I actually got to see in person. Isn't that neat? I love to reminisce.

I returned to where I had been sitting and spotted something else. I got really excited about this one.

What on earth is it? Look again:

It is a spaghetti lamp on my yoga mat. And why do I have my Droid with me during yoga? Because of my meditation timer app.

So now you know why I was sitting on the floor. I can find the most interesting ways to put off yoga and meditation some mornings.

Alright, so I have to write about this one...

Really, I *have* to write about this. Pictures won't do it justice, and I'm actually somewhat afraid to take them. A little bit of hell has broken loose at Casa Didgeridoo again, by way of something that seemed like a step towards semi-calm and quasi-normality. What might that have been?

Foot Foot has left the dining room. She knocked the door open and came back into the main part of the house, literally jumped up on the thing and bopped it open, stalking in as if her life's purpose depended on that very thing. Didgeridoo Boy and I were shocked, but he said he knew she would eventually do something like that, and we proceeded to welcome her back. Totsi the Dog pranced around like she was showing her everything that had changed in her almost-two-month absence. Jupiter Jones...

...pounced. But not in a mean way. Oh, no, it was a playful pounce, the kind he's just learned how to do and is putting his all into mastering. He bunches himself down on the floor, does a butt scooty move, focuses, and springs about three feet into the air over a distance of no less than four feet. Foot Foot did not share our delight in his display of this maneuver, and went back to where she came from.

But she didn't stay. Oh, no, it's her intent to be back in the house. Likewise, it is Jupiter's intent to lure her into lively play - which she always makes sure to let him know is not an option in this lifetime. He doesn't seem to be taking the hint.

Since Foot Foot burst back into the living room, he has been trying, and she has been growling and hissing. The only time it stops is if the two cats are asleep - - sometimes, Foot Foot growls and hisses when the kitten is nowhere around. She carries on while she's eating. She gave herself a bath in the middle of a room, growling and hissing, while the kitten was nowhere to be found. Yesterday, she hissed at her water dish. From morning till night, they are in an almost perpetual walk chase punctuated with Jupiter's pounces and loud exclamations from Foot Foot. All around the house they go - Foot Foot walks, waxing operatic, and Jupiter follows, occasionally popping into the air and landing near the tip of her tail. When he lands, there is a little explosion of dismay from Foot Foot, who sometimes tries to dribble his head like a basketball. Then they dash a bit, sit for a while, and go back to walking. Sometimes I have to intervene with the Evil Kitty bottle.

Which, predictably enough, is what I have to run do right now - after I refill the thing. Enjoy your day, and please send wishes that I don't wind up in the middle of a flurry of kitty claws.

Me, my mohawk, and I...

1989:

1990:

1991:

Friday morning Didgeriplacements...

As I've mentioned before, Didgeridoo Boy expresses himself frequently through the art of placement. This morning, I was met with *three* new examples of his work when I jotted into the living room after yoga and meditation:

(Keys right by a flattened Munchos bag, the bottom of which is aligned just so with the edge of the counter.)

(Empty bottles placed just......so.)

( Didge's dinner plate. Empty. On a speaker.)

Enjoy your weekend!

Notice anything?

Is it just me, or does something funny happen when you play with the Vignette app in a moving car?

Didgeridoo Boy's element...

Attempt fails, so crashes...